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  • My Birthday Pass

    September 24, 2020 by

    There are two days out of every year which are especially difficult for those grieving the loss of a loved one. The person’s birthday, and the anniversary of their death. I give myself a free pass on those days. Today is Jillian’s birthday. I remember that day. The day you were born 31 years ago… Read more

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  • You Matter to me

    June 8, 2020 by

    The older I get, the clearer my vision. I’m not talking about my eyesight. I’m talking about the lens in which I view my world. After Jillian died, my eyes were opened to a deeper dimension. Cancer and death has changed me in many ways. Many of them good. Many, some may argue, not so… Read more

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  • Melanoma Awareness Month 2020

    May 3, 2020 by

    I couldn’t breathe. As I lay my head down on the pillow, I couldn’t breathe. The heaviness in my heart was suffocating. I felt immobilized, numb with pain, not knowing how to feel any other way. Not knowing if I ever would, or even if I wanted to. I’ve never felt such loss and utter… Read more

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  • COVID19- Day Temporary

    April 15, 2020 by

    Saturday evening, March 14 was when my mother and I decided to quarantine in an effort to keep her safe from the Coronavirus. She’s 87. Stubborn as a mule. This decision was before the Governor issued the Stay at Home order, so I was rather pushy about it. The first week went okay. I’ve been… Read more

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  • Dehydrating for Fuel

    March 1, 2020 by

    After Jillian died, the last thing I thought about was my health. My mind was a dark place, full of dark thoughts. Black. Like Melanoma. There were days when I caught glimpses of sunshine, although to this day, I cannot think, cannot hear the word,” sunshine” without cringing. I still feel a sense of guilt… Read more

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  • Love, Time, Death

    February 2, 2020 by

     While I was in Tennessee last week, I was able to attend the kids church. Kaytie, my daughter in law, had reservations about my attending. Their pastor has been preaching on a series, Love, Time, Death. They had covered Time the previous week, and she was concerned about how I would handle a sermon on Death.… Read more

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  • Toes in the Sand

    January 5, 2020 by

    The Christmas tree has been taken down and stored until next year. The outdoor lights are all packed away. The Christmas Villages have been carefully placed in their boxes and brought up to the attic. I’m not sad about it. With all the activities and tasks associated with Christmas, I absolutely love this down time… Read more

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  • So long, 2019. Welcome 2020!

    December 31, 2019 by

    I remember many years ago when New Year’s Eve was a time for celebration and comradery with my friends and loved ones. A simpler time when life wasn’t complicated. But our situations change, our children get older, as do we. Each New Year’s Eve, my dearest friend Mary and I would look at each other… Read more

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